Unveiling the Mystery: What Kind of Women Do Men Secretly Desire?
Understanding Male Desires: The Ideal Woman in Bed
Because of my introverted nature since childhood and being quite shy, I rarely discuss personal matters with others. This time, I am asking because I have encountered something I find difficult to understand. I have been with him for over 3 years. He is nearly 8 years older than me and is a businessman. We met at a relative’s birthday party, perhaps because he and my relatives are familiar with each other, and my relatives also approved of his character, so even though he is much older than me, no one in my family opposed us being together. When he pursued me initially, he said he found my simplicity, purity, and lack of affectation refreshing and felt that I could purify his soul. Although his words were a bit exaggerated, I didn’t mind because his image as a businessman, contrary to my perception of businessmen being smooth talkers, made his exaggeration tolerable. We naturally came together, and he guided me with his experience and took care of me like a younger sister in our daily lives.
The first time we were intimate, I felt a bit awkward, like a block of wood, lacking in charm, and worried that I might dampen his spirits. He comforted me afterwards, praised me, gave me confidence, and told me he liked my innocence and reserve, saying he didn’t like a promiscuous feeling and felt that being passive like me was the way a woman should be. I believed him and stopped worrying about it, calmly maintaining my conservative, passive, and reserved nature in our intimate moments. But I have noticed that in the past half year, he has been less and less interested in intimacy. Once, when he returned from a business trip, I was missing him terribly and clung to him, hinting that it had been a long time since we had been together. Every time he returned from a trip before, we would be like newlyweds, and he would always be actively affectionate, and we would be close for a long time. That time, he simply patted my head and said he was too tired and not in the mood. Although I felt a bit disappointed at the time, I didn’t say much because I understood him. Perhaps it’s just my sensitivity, but I feel his interest in me is waning. Even in our rare intimate moments, he doesn’t seem as engaged as before, giving me a sense of hurriedly completing a task.
Perhaps the impact of sexual frustration on women is really significant, as I have become more prone to anger. Last week, we had another argument over a small matter. It started with me commenting that a female character in a TV series was too promiscuous, unrealistic, and inconsistent with her character. He replied, “But men like it.” We then turned the characters in the TV series into ourselves, and I was so angry that I started bringing up past issues, questioning whether he had lost interest and was being perfunctory in our intimate moments now. This embarrassing argument ended with his remark, “Who can stand licking a piece of wood every day?” We have been cold-shouldering each other for a week now, and I am really angry. Didn’t he say he liked a reserved woman? Was it all just to placate me at the beginning? If he said he liked someone more open, I would be willing to adjust myself for him. Can any experienced person tell me what kind of woman men really like in bed?!
What kind of women do men really like in bed? For men, it’s natural to be attracted to women who can ignite endless fantasies and desires, and arouse physical impulses just by being around them. Think back to the early stages of love, everything seemed full of novelty and passion, right? Because you didn’t know each other well, it was just the hormones that made you curious and eager to explore each other, making you unable to resist imagining what kind of person the other truly was. But once you are in a long-term intimate relationship, both of you gradually become accustomed to each other, and the excitement is gradually replaced by a sense of security, which can bring calmness but not passion. So, compared to the initial passionate love, many people will feel that the relationship has become dull.
In fact, it’s just because both sides are too familiar with each other, losing the curiosity and imagination, that the initial interest is gone. People have a natural inclination towards novelty, and if the sexual activities and processes remain unchanged for a long time, the excitement of sexual activities will naturally diminish, leading to what this lady mentioned—her husband seems to have lost interest in lovemaking, and the excitement during the sexual process is not as strong as before. Whether a woman can stimulate a man’s desire for her is not absolutely related to the woman’s personality. What needs to change is the established mode of interaction between you. Make some changes that he cannot predict, and let him feel the novelty of getting to know you again.
For women who have always been open in sexual activities, if you find that even walking in front of him naked fails to arouse his desire, try being more conservative, as the allure of being half-hidden might be more attractive than being completely exposed. For relatively conservative women, remember, boldly expressing your desires and promptly responding to your own feelings. Don’t think that being open in bed is “lewd”; whether it is lewd or not is a subjective matter, depending on the person. Making love with your beloved is a kind of romance, a kind of sensuality, and a way of showing your care for him. If you are too shy, you can also seek external help, such as sexy lingerie and dim lighting, giving a half-hidden feeling, making him curious to explore. Once his desire is aroused, you don’t have to do much, just go with the flow.
In short, if you are usually passive in intimate relationships, you can try to take the initiative in flirting; if you are bold, you can try to resist and then yield; if you usually only make love at home, then invite him to make love at a different place. Men like women who can arouse their sexual interest, and to arouse a man’s desire, you just need to change your established mode of interaction, and provide him with verbal and visual stimulation, making him curious about your changes.
I hope the above is useful to you, improving your married life and enhancing your marital relationship.
