“I Believe in Love, But Don’t Rely on Marriage”—A Sentence that Stings Many Women’s Hearts

When we were young, we all longed for a beautiful love, holding hands with the one we liked for a lifetime, just like the prince and princess in fairy tales, happily growing old together.

This is an ideal in life, but reality often doesn’t turn out that way. Not all love stories have a happy ending.

Love is unpredictable. When love comes, we sincerely see the other person as the most important in our lives. However, worldly temptations are strong, and sometimes love deviates from its original intent.

When a love story doesn’t last, there are various reasons. It’s best if it works out, but if something goes wrong along the way, would you still believe in love?

Many people hesitate on this question, but giving up everything for one person is too cruel, as not everyone in this world is the same.

So, how can one protect themselves from getting hurt in love?

A close friend and her boyfriend dated for over 6 years. Everyone thought they would naturally move towards marriage as they transitioned from the ivory tower to society. However, the friend hesitated because of fear.

After witnessing much joy and sorrow in the world, many people, like the friend, hold onto such a mindset—loving without marrying to avoid being deeply wounded.

Not getting married for the time being is fine, but in the end, everyone still desires a result from a love story.

The boyfriend proposed several times, and the friend finally agreed, but she was still uneasy.

Marriage can bring a sense of security, but it also means fearing being in a vulnerable position. However, if one keeps refusing, would the man they love eventually choose someone else after repeated disappointments?

It’s hard to say. In “Dear Myself,” Chen Yiming and Li Siyu dated for years. Li Siyu refused marriage for the sake of her career, fearing she would end up like Zhizhi after marriage.

Despite her repeated refusals, she eventually pushed Chen Yiming towards Wang Ziru. Is there really no solution to this issue?

Last year, Ma Yili, who had divorced, was asked, “Do you still believe in love?” She replied, “People always have the right and freedom to pursue true love.”

She and Wen Zhang once deeply loved each other. They even named their eldest daughter “Wenai Ma.” At that time, Wen Zhang’s love for her was beyond doubt.

However, Wen Zhang did not cherish this love. Although Ma Yili chose to forgive him and told him to “cherish it,” cracks appeared in the marriage, and it could no longer be the same as before, eventually leading to a separation.

After the divorce, Ma Yili revealed that she went through a year-long low point in her life, feeling powerless and often breaking down in tears.

But if a marriage can continue, no woman would want a divorce. After being together for over a decade, intimately connected, it takes a long time to adapt to a sudden separation.

However, when a marriage is beyond repair, one must face reality. Apart from learning to accept and face it, there is no other way.

Nietzsche said, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

After realizing this, Ma Yili swept away the haze of divorce. She had loved and tried her best. Now that things had come to this, rather than enduring the torment in marriage, it was better to free oneself and live as one’s true self.

Therefore, one should still believe in love and continue with marriage as usual. Finding the right person to build a small family and hope for a better life are not contradictory.

Not marrying does not guarantee a good life, and getting married does not necessarily mean a bad one.

The most important thing is that more and more women are beginning to understand that happiness is in their own hands, not something to beg from men.

Ma Yili once considered being the woman behind Wen Zhang after marriage, willingly raising children and taking care of the family, supporting Wen Zhang’s career wholeheartedly.

But after he betrayed her, she finally understood that true happiness can only be created by oneself. Relying on others may only lead to hurt and tears.

After a period of silence following the divorce, she fully understood that everyone needs love. Don’t let one bad experience make you fear for the next ten years.

But even if she finds love again and enters into marriage, she won’t rely on it as much as she did before.

Song Dandan once said, “A woman’s life is summed up in three words: ‘Rely on yourself.’”

This life lesson was learned after experiencing several emotional traumas. It’s quite true when you think about it.

Only when you rely on yourself will you not be anxious in marriage, not fear being disliked by your partner, and not worry about keeping up with them or facing crises in marriage.

Even if you go through all these, you will quickly stand up after a period of sadness.

Gu Jia in “Nothing But Thirty” is a woman who stood up by relying on herself. She hoped to push Xu Huanshan from behind to achieve a leap in the family’s social class, only needing to be a perfect full-time housewife behind the scenes.

Despite her efforts, Xu Huanshan betrayed her. Although she nearly collapsed after learning the truth, she quickly regained her composure and immersed herself in a new life.

Believing in her strength, she will eventually encounter love again. In her next marriage, she won’t just rely on men for a bright future; she will make her dreams come true herself.

Nowadays, more and more women are awakening and working hard on their careers.

The goal is to make their “trump cards” stronger, so they can reduce the potential harm they may face in the future.

It’s not that they don’t believe in men’s love; it’s just that there are too many unpredictable things in life. Instead of panicking when that day comes, it’s better to prepare adequately in advance for one’s life.

If women aren’t strong, their status isn’t secure.

Life has turned former weak women into independent and strong women. Though it may seem harsh, it’s actually a good thing.

In the past, elders used to say, “It’s better to rely on yourself than on having parents or a husband.”

Indeed, only when women become strong themselves, they have nothing to fear in love and marriage, don’t you think?