Does Chatting with a Girl Every Day Make Her Like You?

Many guys are used to pursuing girls, and the most common approach is to chat with her every day.

Is this really effective? I think at most, it just establishes attraction, but it’s still a long way from a committed relationship. To truly make a girl like you and establish a relationship with her, the following three levels of development are absolutely essential.

1. Foundational Development at the Attitude Level

I believe that the most important aspect of attitude is the willingness to “express interest in the girl directly and quickly” and “not worry about losing or getting tangled up.”

This attitude is definitely built on the foundation of having a girl first.

If your phone always has several girls willing to go on dates with you, having a “bevy of beauties” will improve your attitude. If you only have one girl willing to go on a date with you, or you have no other options, it’s hard for your attitude to be positive. It’s impossible not to feel entangled and lost.

PS: I’m not teaching you to be a player, “loyalty” and “love of freedom” are both very attractive qualities in a man, and they are not contradictory.

But think about it, when a girl opens her phone and constantly receives messages from 10 guys trying to hit on her, and you’re the only guy she can contact, it’s hard for your attitude to be positive.

2. Foundational Development at the Cognitive Level

You need to truly understand the girl, who is genuinely interested in you, rather than her giving you a false “interest” and you hastily expressing your interest.

This will only make the girl think that you’re not stable in terms of “interest,” and you don’t understand what women really think. The other day, I was chatting with two girls, and they said something to me that left a deep impression:

“Many men always think they are pursuing us, but in reality, most of the time, we are the ones pursuing them. So they always think they have a chance, but are actually just a backup.”

A girl’s willingness to eagerly accept your invitation or express “interest indicators” to you often does not mean that you “attracted” her, but rather that she feels your conditions are still pretty good, and she strings you along, making you more willing to invest time, effort, and money in her.

You must remember one thing:

It’s very easy to enter into ambiguous relationships, but extremely difficult to truly form an intimate relationship.

Only by avoiding this trap can you correctly express your feelings, otherwise at this point, expressing interest will only get you entangled.

3. Foundational Development at the Operational Level

Even if you can make a girl burst into laughter with your humor, if you can’t create points for advancement in your conversation, then these words will not bring you results—after all, you can’t always wait for the girl to initiate a kiss, the probability of this is really low.

You see a guy who’s very humorous, he’s not lacking in beautiful girls, but you overlook the fact that many other guys are very humorous and still lack beautiful girls.

So, attributing “bevy of beauties” to humor is a mistake.

Humorous words, correct displays, or even words that create emotional resonance should only be auxiliary products of your “dating” conversation. They can add points for you, but they are not the most important core.

If you don’t have the ability to truly create opportunities for “advancing an intimate relationship” in your conversation, then you won’t be able to truly “advance the relationship” physically. After the date ends, your relationship with the girl will still be at a standstill.

Over time, this will lead to a long-lasting friendship that cannot be broken through.

So, all persuasive words not aimed at “achieving results” and “creating points to advance an intimate relationship” are peripheral, no matter how brilliant they may be.

The true core of persuasive words, I believe you already know.

If a man relies on a woman’s “positive feedback” to determine his own behavior and language, fundamentally, it’s a form of “pleasing” and seeking approval.

All persuasive words and actions created to “gain a woman’s interest,” and “attract” her, are actually seeking a woman’s approval, hoping she will tell you: “Come on, you can continue.”

To truly operate “result-oriented persuasive words,” quickly advancing the distance between you and the girl, the most important thing you need to learn is not to try hard to “attract” her, but rather how to “express your interest correctly and without risk,” making it impossible for her to refuse. This is a gradual process.

All “chatting words” during a “date” ultimately aim for the “result of an intimate relationship,” and it’s only because the girl has a certain “level of intimacy + her own charm” with you that she will start thinking about you, and then like you, and fall in love with you; rather than having a spirited conversation or making her laugh or making her feel that you have “high value.”